Pressure Performer

I'm starting to realize how well I work under pressure. All my life, I've always tried to be organized and tried not to procrastinate. I've always tried to be perfect in rehearsal, rather than just waiting until the performance. But sometimes, right after things go wrong or right as I walk on stage is when I get my best work done.

For example, this week we filmed our STAC Live commercial. In this commercial, Sarah is in a box, and pops up in various classrooms and yells "come to STAC Live!" and then gets back into the box and leaves. For about a week, our group had planned to meet with different teachers on different periods so that we could get the shooting done.

The day of shooting however, was a complete disaster. The box was breaking and all of the teachers that we had planned to meet with were nowhere to be found. We were completely distraught on what to do. Finally, we decided to just run around and see what happened. And that's when everything really started to fall into place.

Our end product (as of now) is a whole lot better than the ideas that we started with. I think the randomness and crazyness of the shoot let us really be free with the idea, and just go with the flow. It gave the commercial more of an easygoing mood.

I don't know how the commercial is going to come out, since we haven't finished editing, but I'm pretty proud of how well we all worked together to get it done.

A lot of times, the same scenario happens to me. Being asked to perform at the worst moments possible. Without any practice or any knowledge of what is even going on.

I can't begin to explain how many dance competitions and shows I've been in where 5 minutes before I stepped onto the stage I was given different directions or different blocking. And every single time, I've hit that last minute change.

Granted, for someone who is as stressed out as I am, pressure performing may not be the greatest thing to deal with before a show. But, I feel like it's the only way I really get things done perfectly.

Sometimes before shows and recitals, I completely forget everything. All of the steps, my lines, my blocking, everything, seconds before I'm about to go on stage. And then suddenly, once I actually step into the spotlight, it's like it all comes flooding back. The pressure of performance brings it all back.

It's a really stressful thing to think about, but thankfully it always works for me. Of course, I absolutely don't want to rely on it, because maybe someday I'll stop being a pressure performer. But for now, I'm glad to have that net of security under me every time I stress out about a show.

It's a kind of funny thing, pressure performing. Because you really never know what's going to happen next. Just when everything seems like it's falling apart, it suddenly all starts to go right. So for now, I'm going to take my pressure performing and expand on it. And maybe, it'll just get that much easier and that much better.